


A Life Worth Living: Lin and Vanessa

by AlexandraHamilfan (SilverMillennium_QueenNeptune)



Series: Father's Day Ficlets 2019 [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda (Broadway Cast) RPF
Genre: F/M, Face-Sitting, Married Couple, Married Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Woman on Top
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-13
Updated: 2019-07-13
Packaged: 2020-05-12 19:04:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19235248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverMillennium_QueenNeptune/pseuds/AlexandraHamilfan
Summary: Short, sweet, eventually dirty Lin and Vanessa two shot set during Hamilton, for Father's Day. Can be viewed as a companion ficlet to "Everything You Gave Me." Centered around my imaginings of Lin's intimate relationship with Vanessa and his thoughts and worries about becoming a father for the first and second time.  Romantic smut will be involved.





	1. A New Journey

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Everything You Gave Me](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18797644) by [AlexandraHamilfan (SilverMillennium_QueenNeptune)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverMillennium_QueenNeptune/pseuds/AlexandraHamilfan). 



> I'm so sorry that this story turned out very, very belated... the smut plot bunnies hid from me so excuse anything that doesn't make sense.

Every time Lin-Manuel went on stage, there was always one person he looked for first. One face that could make every fear and every worry disappear. When he'd begun dating Vanessa, he knew exactly what he was falling into. She was luminous, beautiful, smart-- no, smart was not the word to describe her. Brilliant.  He always convinced himself he'd never get her. Never get to love her, never know what it was like to be with her.   
  
There was no world in which Lin could make sense of his life. He was married to the most incredible woman on the planet, a woman he'd suspected was out of his league for years. She had the biggest heart he'd ever known. He did not deserve her. But somehow, in spite of every flaw,  _she_ had chosen  _him._ She'd accepted the challenge of loving him, and for that, Lin wanted to give Vanessa the world. God only knew how difficult it would be for her. He wasn't away much--his own fear of leaving New York, and by proxy leaving her prevented it. Some days he let his mind wander, often thinking about silly little things. Things Vanessa could never have expected or remembered.  He recalled the night he'd finally gotten up the courage to speak to her, and invited her to a show he was putting on with his improvisation group. Lin's flair for the dramatic had always served him well, and he could be persuasive when he wanted to be. He drew an audience in like no one Vanessa had ever known, and just like that, he drew her in, too. 

Their relationship had occurred in what felt like a vortex. Just the two of them shutting out everyone and everything else in the world. His head in the clouds; her feet on the ground keeping them both from floating away. Now Lin had Vanessa, and there was only one thing to do. He had to make her his forever. In September of 2010, he did just that. The image of Vanessa in white, walking down an aisle to meet him, her soon to be husband, made Lin's head spin. He knew that marrying her was perfect; she had lit a spark in him that no one would ever be able to put out.  Javier would often tease Lin about the way Vanessa consumed him. If they couldn't be together, he had suggested, Lin would die of a broken heart. Lin knew it was true. 

* * *

 The week of Valentine's Day 2014 had been a crazy one for the Mirandas. Lin was working as though his life depended on it. Vanessa, saint that she was, insisted on caring for him. She wanted to make sure he was eating, sleeping, things he forgot to do when he worked. She knew he needed a break. So she stole his laptop. 

"Vanessa! I have to work.", he whined. 

"No, you don't, Lin. Please? Take a rest for a while. You need a break, and I need my husband. . .", she whispered, watching his eyes darken as his imagination ran wild with the idea of what she was implying. 

"What are you trying to say?" As soon as the words left him, his face crinkled.  She hadn't brought him too far out of character after all.  She bit back a laugh, crawling toward him instead. She knew him well, and she was completely aware of the little things that drove him crazy. 

"Need you. Please, Lin. Don't make me beg. Please." Vanessa knew she was already past that point. Lin was exactly what she had needed, in more ways than one. He was loving and caring and sweet when he needed to be. But all she could imagine was the feeling of his skin against hers, their lips grazing each other. . . the two of them consumed with one another. They had agreed to wait a few years before having kids so both of them could focus on their careers. But they had done just that. The realization struck Lin as he tried to talk himself out of it, to list reasons why he shouldn't want a child right now. One look into her eyes undid it all, and Lin found himself falling apart. 

"Bedroom, now.", he ordered. Vanessa was a bit puzzled at first, since she knew Lin was never the type to want intimacy with her when he was supposed to be working. But then, there was a different side to Lin, a passionate, carefree side that no one but Vanessa got to see, ever. They barely made it through the bedroom door before his lips were on hers, their clothes rapidly piling in a heap as he let her land on the bed,  prepared to break her fall. In the three years since their marriage, Vanessa had learned that Lin was cautious in some things, but spontaneous in others.  She thought ahead of him, reached for a condom, but Lin stopped her. 

"Not this time,  _mi amor._ You said you needed me, no?"

"I--yes."

"Then let me do this the right way, this time. I want us both to feel everything." He took his time, trailing kisses across Vanessa's frame, so warm and loving that it made her feel like melting into a puddle. When Lin knew exactly what he wanted, he had no trouble being vocal about it. Soon, Vanessa was unable to keep herself together, moaning with nearly every movement as he drew her closer to him. Slow, languid movements and gentle caresses soon turned to pleas for more. 

"Lin. . . don't stop."

"Mm. Look at you. So desperate you don't know what to do with yourself anymore. Hm? That why you're teasing me?"

"I'm not. . ."

"Don't. I can see it. But you know better...", he warned, punctuating the thought with a nibble on the side of her neck. Vanessa toyed with the fabric of her dress, deliberately trying to get him riled at this point. Anything she could do to show him exactly what she needed.  He sat back at first, content to watch the movement of her hands as she attempted to pleasure herself, but it was almost too much for her. That was when he swooped in to take care of her.

"No. Let me, 'Nessa." His hand replaced her own, his fingers gently thrusting in and out of her as he watched her reaction to know how much she could take. 

"Already falling apart for me, hm? Then maybe we should change things up a little. . ." He rolled the two of them over and then pulled her into a sitting position. When he helped her settle in, Vanessa realized what he was doing, and laughed out loud in spite of herself.

"Lin. What are you. . ."

"I know, I know. We've  never done this before. But I've also never given you more than one orgasm in one go. I'm changing that today. Wanna taste you for a change, love. Just drop, and let me do the work, please." Before she could argue, her dress was out of the way, his hands on her hip, his tongue toying relentlessly with her clit. Vanessa bit her lip to keep a moan from escaping, clutching at anything she could to keep herself together despite the waves of pleasure coursing through her. 

 _How is he_ so  _damn good at this?_ Her mind whirled, searching for the answer. When she couldn't think straight enough to find it, she started to beg, instantly embarrassed by how needy it made her sound. 

"More, please. . ." As if he had been urged on by her response, he dug his fingers into her flesh, and this time Vanessa outright screamed for more. That elicited a pause and a pleased groan from Lin. Within moments, she was close to the edge. At her peak, her fingers were hopelessly tangled in his hair, and the release was so overwhelming that he was the only thing keeping her upright.  At last she tried to let him go, but he wasn't quite ready for it to end. 

"No. Stay."

"Lin, be sensible. We have time. All the time in the world. And you've been doing all the work. For God's sake, at bare minimum we  _have_ to hydrate. When we have, I'm gonna pay you back for that last one." He rolled his eyes, but propped himself up on his elbows. 

"Whatever you say,  _mi vida._ " He knew Vanessa was the voice of reason in their relationship, when his brain and heart were overcome with lust. When he considered her words, he realized just how right she was. This was a marathon, and he couldn't be caught unprepared, not if he was going to make sure they finished together.  
A bottle of water did sound like a good idea, and he needed time to get his head together. The thought of her with a baby in her arms-- their child, his son. He's not quite certain why he's so convinced it will be a boy, but okay...--is almost too much for him.  His mind brings images: singing to his son, letting the cast fawn over him, the pressures of keeping him safe. In that moment, he couldn't be sure that he's ready.  
_What if I'm not good enough? What if I mess up, scar the kid for life? What if I can't protect him?_ When Vanessa returned, she found him staring blankly at the wall.

"Lin? You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. I promise. I've just. . . been thinking a lot about kids, lately. What if I'm a shit father, honey?" Vanessa frowned at his expression, but she understood where he was coming from. Lin has always been an oversensitive creative. She was painfully aware of the life he had, the mistakes he didn't want to make with their kids. She knew it was why they had waited so long.

"If you're worried honey, you've got people around who can give you advice. Talk to your father. Talk to Chris and Veronica. But right now, all I need is for you to take a breath and be here, in the moment with me. Please." She was right, as usual. God, she would make an amazing mother.  Lin sighed, propped himself up on his elbows and breathed, praying to God it didn't hitch in his throat.  He'd been so patient, waited so long for her, and now, in spite of the doubts or the worries he'd screw up, he was ready.  He wanted her more than ever. They were going to have the family they'd always dreamed of, and Lin would not let anything get in the way of Vanessa's happiness or their desire to start a family.  His insecurities about being a good father were invalidated by everything he knew. He had seen how his own father had cared for him and his sister. Now it was his turn.

As he looked at Vanessa he knew that their child would experience the same love and protection. There was no question that he would do his best to make the world as safe as possible for his son or daughter, a child with Vanessa's brains and his creativity. Vanessa chose the perfect moment to come strolling back into the room, robe hanging off of her body to tease him. She knew he was concerned, but she also understood that sometimes Lin just needed to let his mind go blank. If he was focused on her, that would happen easily.  She crawled back to him, handing him a bottle of water. As soon as he noticed the way she approached, the teasing sway of her hips, just enough to let his imagination run wild with the thought of her exposed and open for him alone, he lost himself in what could only be described as pure lust.

"Get over here, Vanessa. Now.", he ordered, the bottles of water forgotten on the table beside the bed. For her part, Vanessa moved as slowly as she could, until she found herself pressed against him. The closer they were, the more it felt as though she was losing control.  She only had one request, but it was the one thing she had always believed he'd never let her do, until now.

"You want to ask, don't you? Go ahead. Say it. Tell me exactly what you want.", he whispered. His voice was like she'd never heard it. It was the low, seductive tone she'd heard him use a million times before, but something about this felt more desperate. He was in command, just as she'd always wanted him to be.

"All I want is you, Lin."

"That isn't all you want. Say it. I need you to ask. What _exactly_ is it that you need from me?", he emphasized again. 

"I want to have you. All of you. Wanna feel you filling me up. I don't want to wait, so please?" She smiled when he reached for the drawer, knowing exactly what he was thinking. They hadn't wanted to start a family too early, so safe sex had been a must, until tonight.

"Wait, Lin. Not this time. I'm ready. Ready to start a family with you. I don't care anymore. I just need you."

"What?  Are you sure...? I mean we talked about. . . your career, what about. . ."  Vanessa sighed, and shrugged out of her robe, the silky fabric hitting the floor without a sound. 

"I just want you, Lin-Manuel. Nothing else. Nothing between us. Nothing stopping us. I know you're worried. But you're going to make a wonderful father. So please, just let me do this for you."

Lin was still captivated by her, still sure that spending the rest of his life with her was the best decision he'd ever made.  Vanessa was the greatest thing in his life, for now, but she had plans to change that.  She had already made up her mind that this time was going to be different, and he surprised her by agreeing. 

"I understand, it's more attractive for you when I'm on top. But just trust me here, Lin. Science is on your side. If we want to have a baby, you should probably be on top of me." Lin didn't dare argue. Vanessa was a scientist.  He watched as she splayed herself out on the bed before lifting her legs and placing them on his shoulders.

"I love you 'Nessa. I'll be as gentle as I can."  A few encouraging moans were all it took for Lin to pick up speed. He peppered her neck with kisses, and then whispered into her ear as he came,

"My best of wives and best of women. You'll make a wonderful mother."

 

 

 


	2. Are You Ready to Try Again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title inspired by the opening lines of the Nina/Benny love song "Sunrise" from Lin-Manuel Miranda's musical "In The Heights", On Father's Day 2017, Lin thinks back to the weeks around Mother's Day of the previous year, when Vanessa conceived their second child.

Every time Lin picked Francisco up, it made him wonder. He was awestruck that he and Vanessa had created this lovely little human life. He still couldn't believe this was his life. Honestly, Vanessa getting pregnant again when she did was a surprise to no one, but it was how quickly Lin had adjusted to the idea of becoming a father again that came as a shock.  He wondered if maybe it was because they knew each other better now, knew what they were getting into. 

Fatherhood had been a joy so far for Lin, but there had been plenty of curveballs along the way. From midnight calls to his dad or his friend Chris, who had kids of his own, Lin's life had only grown more hectic since both the boys were born. The second time around, intimacy had been just a little easier, since he wasn't wrapped up in too many hectic projects at once.  Even with all of that, the more things change, the more they stay the same.

* * *

Mother's Day, 1 year prior. 

This Mother's Day, Vanessa attempted to let Lin sleep in, knowing her creative-minded husband was probably freaking out over the boys. Vanessa knew how much Lin concerned himself with spending enough time with them, making them smile or laugh. On this Father's Day, her mind drifts, and she remembers Lin surprising her.  She thinks about how he told her he wanted to be a father again. She remembers him dancing around the living room to Bruno Mars, attempting to sing along to "That's What I Like" if only to make her laugh.  What she never expected was the chance for the moment to become more intimate.

"Y'know, it wasn't just the song talking for me. You're my wife, Vanessa. I love you. I love being with you. Whatever you want, you can have. 'All this is here for you'."

"You're quoting Bruno Mars to me. Okay. I see you. What are you trying to do, Lin?"

"If I said I was trying to have another baby with you, would you hate me?" Vanessa froze. Did Lin want another child? Obviously, or he wouldn't have said anything. She wasn't sure she was ready for that. Was he? They had talked about having another child, but Lin's fears had reared their ugly head again. He wanted their children to be as free as he had been to create and explore. But they were living in a whole different era now. New York was a whole different monster. 

His worries are different now too.  He always wanted to keep Sebastian's face out of the media. He wanted both his boys to be safe, and now he wonders. Can he do it? Will it be enough? It's Vanessa who snaps him out of the melancholy he's in. 

"You're an amazing father." The words are a whisper, but they're there, only for him to hear, to hold tight to when he needs them.  Frantic and still unbelieving, he calls Chris. 

"Do you think I'll be a good father?" Chris pauses for a moment, wonders if perhaps Lin is on something, or afraid. The question hangs, dead in the air. Lin almost hangs up. 

"Lin-Man. You're already a good father. You will continue to be." When Lin finally got up the nerve to tell Vanessa how he felt, what Chris said, she smiled understandingly. She's an angel he didn't deserve and he knows it. That's when Vanessa decided to up the ante. 

"You said you were here for me. Prove it." Before Lin can say another word, she's trapped herself beneath him. 

"That was fast."

"I'm yours, Lin. Always have been, always will be. Now shut up and fuck me before our son wakes up, Please?" This time, it's different, heat flowing through both of their bodies. Lin's teeth penetrating the delicate skin on Vanessa's neck. There's no need for foreplay, it seems, and yet, Vanessa has other ideas. She pushed him off her and then found her way to her knees. 

Before Lin realizes what she's doing and can comprehend it, he feels it. Vanessa, always the tease, gently jerks and toys with his cock. If she can get him hard now, it won't take him long to finish. She knows that and so does he.  He groans, soft curses falling from his lips. Luckily for both of them, Vanessa never minds being called all sorts of dirty nicknames in the bedroom. But today, one of them finally gets to her, in a good way. 

"Look at you. You filthy little whore. Can't get enough of me, can you?"

"I may be a whore, but I'm still yours. Always."

"But even a slut like you would never let anybody this close to you, hm? Cause nobody knows you like me, do they, Nessa?"

"No,  _papí._ Nobody knows me like you do. You know exactly what I like."

"That's my girl. My Vanessa, my princess. Mine."

"You're my Lin-Manuel. Always." It doesn't take long after that for him to give her two orgasms in quick succession. The second one hits her so hard he has to cover her mouth to keep her from waking Sebastian. She rides out the last of her high with him, and then collapses by his side. 

* * *

 

 By the tiime Father's Day rolled around a month after that encounter, Vanessa knew something was wrong. She was ill and throwing up. But she also knew it would make the perfect present for Lin. When he opened his gifts, she handed him a simply wrapped box, watching his hands shake as he discovered the test inside. 

"I missed my pill the last time we--and well-- Happy Father's Day, baby." Now, every single Father's Day, Lin thanks Vanessa for giving birth to his sons, and for giving him a life worth living. 


End file.
